How's life treating you?

[Private to Parker]
Where the fuck are you?

[Private to Kay]
I need a list of what's missing from your safe. I want to make sure she didn't keep anything after her little trip.

[Private to Paddy]
You're going to be down two people for dinner. Sorry about it.

...Tomorrow too.

[There's a pause for a moment, and then she comes on and sounds really annoyed and disgusted.] There are times when I fucking hate this ship.

Howie told you what we did was fake, and it was. As for everything else, fuck it. And fuck Rex Lewis too.

( Privates to: Parker, Paddy, Molly, Angelica, Sveta, Tosh, Laura, Adam, Shego, Howie and Aleera. )

[Filtered to Parker's tough ass ladies: Shego, Una, Angelica, Sveta, Laura, Parker and Sarah]
How do you ladies feel about some poker?

[Private to Paddy]
I'm still fucking pissed, I think
Damn it, why'd you have to be such a fucking dick about this
If you were anyone else I'd kick your nuts up your throat
You're an asshole, but I still love you.

[Private to Kay]

How you holding up?

[Private to Judas]
You've been fucking quiet.

I have been giving a warning for swearing in front of my god damn kindergarteners.

I'm going to shoot something.

Oh wait! I don't have a gun!

[Private to Parker]

I know you're related to me, you're in my family photos. What are you doing?

[Private to Paddy]

What's your number?

[Have a happy, relaxed looking Parker wearing a truly horrible sweater, one she refused to wear during port. She's holding a cup of eggnog and standing in front of an ornately decorated fireplace. The one in her room if you've been there before. In her hair there's a giant red bow.]

Christmas, it's lovely. I am so glad I'm here for it. I can't bake like Rex, so you should stop by for some eggnog. It's great, just like my Dad used to make.

[Added later, and Parker looks embarrassed.]

I've been assigned an inmate. Parker, you and me need to meet!

[Private to Paddy.]

[A big grin.]

I really owe you an apology. I didn't think mistletoe worked like that I was wrong.

[Private to Uhura]

Sorry I was a bitch to you before. It just really looked wrong and I know how much you hate me. It's alright though, I like you.